


A Star Reborn, a Flame Restored

by littleberd



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: I'm so sorry zadr fans, M/M, What I think would happen, damn it I got suckered into making this an actual story, gawdz this is angsty, it's so sad, ok it won't be so angsty for long
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-25
Updated: 2016-02-10
Packaged: 2018-05-16 03:14:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5811562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littleberd/pseuds/littleberd
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a poem guys, wrote it a long time ago and just found the damn thing. Hope you like it! And now it's going to turn into a story... ~yeah *weakly shakes fist in air* </p><p>So yeah was supposed to just be a poem or two and now it's going to be a damn story. I couldn't just leave his soul floating around in space okay!? That would be cruel to the both of them... granted I'm going to make their lives a living hell in the future ... maybe...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Devoted

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sad guys, this is sad, this is angsty as hell, what am I putting myself through!?

I hated him with all my soul

Every word spoke of him, by me, was a curse

Meetings between us only resulted in a duel til we couldn't move

He was MY enemy

He was MINE to see suffer, _MINE_ to cause pain to, and _**MINE**_ to KILL

And so I did

But now, seeing him, lying there, broken on the ground

I felt, not the satisfaction of seeing him in agony

But, the hollowness of my PAK

He and I... were so much alike

Twins in soul, two sides of the same blade of destruction

Pitted against each other on opposite sides of a war I don't even remember why we are fighting

In another life, we could have been friends

He the protector, I the Invader

He survived swords, and daggers, and poison

And though he would fall, he would rise once more

From a pool of his own blood, a phoenix from it's ashes

Like a vengeful sun in all it's righteous blazing fury

Face, reddened with frustration

Fists, balled up til skin was bone

And weeping red crescents scarred his palms

Eyes, that seemed to hold back the very wrath of hell

Lusting for _my_ pain, glinting with undiluted hate and rage

Others fought, but not as we did, no

They fought with political strings attached, puppets made to dance for their higher-ups

Paper tigers sliced like butter with sharp scissors

We fought against each other, equals in mind, body, and soul

A dance of blades and metal and blood, arching gracefully and with well practiced rhythm

Breaking, tearing, shredding, shattering ourselves till our mirrors shards blended together, our images one

Each injury given, our own

Making us suffer in mutual agony

Punch for bloody punch

Broken bone for every fractured one

A scar for every bleeding and puckered wound

Destined to be our own doom

To be at our throats like the instinctual animals we were

We were devoted

Our matrimony, battle

Our vows, curses of death and demise and destruction

Our kisses of forever, every hurt of our meeting

Our affections, our afflictions

Our wedding rings, the scars which bore our promises, our oaths

Till Death Do Us Part

By our hands at our throats, choking the life out

I knew _him_ more than I knew myself

Every scar on his skin, every thought in his mind

Every drop of blood passing through his bleeding heart, every breath through his lungs

And when his heart ceased it's beating

And his lungs took their last breath

And his skin paled

And his mind halted

And his beautiful burning eyes dimmed, no longer fervent with fury, embers fizzing out

A broken sentence, left unfinished

"We..."

Barely even started

A SINGLE WORD!

I cried, something no Irken has ever done

I felt the hollowness in my chest, where _**OUR**_ shared hyuumun heart-organ was, it is gone

As I had stabbed him in the left side of his chest, I had killed our shared heart

Though I had finally killed him, it still ended without an end

I had won in life, but he had won in death

We were tied, by the outcome of our battle, and by the thread connecting souls

But I had lost

My Hate had consumed me, his fiery orange amber eyes had given me flame

But with their extinquishment, mine froze once more

Unmoving, unseeing, optical lenses, artificial, false, FAKE!

My flame was gone, I was now a hollow husk, a whisp

The cold ash of my phoenix

The sun had gone, I was the moon, and without it's light... I was unseen, invisible, a shade

He had disappeared to some far off star

All that I had become devoted to

Is gone


	2. We

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't stop thinking about what Dib was going to say...
> 
> I'm sorry! I'm posting another poem!

I was dying, my red blood pooling out from my barely beating heart

He had run me through with a sleak metallic PAK limb

Lean green form hovering over my body

Those red dragonfly orbs held cosmos of knowledge and emotion

They had seen so much, they saw my prone form, bleeding out

I know they are implants, nothing but engineered optical eyes

But they are so expressive that they feel real, those eyes-

Always filled to the brim with a fiery passion

Hate, rage, curiosity

But now... I see something else

It's not any of the familiar light I've seen make his eyes glow

No, this is different

They squint in just a way that makes my dying heart flinch

It's not the normal looks, what is it Zim?

Then I see it, the liquid collecting at the bottom of those fathomless scarlet and magenta swirled depths

That's a tear, it almost blends in with his eyes but I could always spot anything off about Zim

He's... about to cry

 _ZIM_ the Bane of my existence, the only **REASON** for my existence is going to cry over my dying body

_Well isn't this something_

I knew Zim, and he never cried

Why is he about to cry over me?

Why is his mouth set in a painful grimace?

You should be LAUGHING ZIM!

LAUGHING FROM JOY!

You've finally slain me!

Why are you leaning down next to me?

Why are you cradling my head?

Didn't you always yell that it would crush anything underneath it?

That you didn't understand how the Earth wasn't wobblying from the sheer weight of it?

Then I hear the almost inaudible sob

His claws shakily caress my gargantuan head

His eyes- they are sorrow ladden

Why are you sad Zim?

I thought you wanted this

Us fighting to the death was always something you enjoyed

That week when I didn't fight you... you were miserable

True we fought over anything when we came face to face

But I thought you hated me-

But now I see that observation isn't quite correct is it

Your galaxy filled eyes are dimming with mine, why Zim?

I thought this is what you wanted

I the Protector of the Earth, You the Invader

Why now, when I'm going blind from deaths clawed sleep, do I see what we could have had?

His eyes roam, a shuddering breath escapes me as he holds his hand over my heart, applying preassure

_It's no use Zim, I've lost too much blood_

My lungs are hurting, each breath I breath in, glass dust scrapes their fleshy walls

Each breath I breath out, plucking the dust from the wounds

_We were so stupid Zim, we could have had so much more time. We could have seen galaxies, explored the universe, loved each other..._

"We..." and then I was floating, _Could have loved_

My soul rose from my body, and I saw something I will always treasure

Something my mortal eyes never saw but my dead ones can never forget

Zim was crying, his tears were clear unpolluted water, crystalline and sacred, more preacious than any diamond

His PAK repeatedly cried out malfunction, but I knew it just couldn't compute Zim

Zim was something no one could compute, he was the other side to my coin

He was the stars and I was their shadow, the night sky

If only, If only

I hugged him, but I knew nothing could be felt

We were always seperated, Irken, Human, Protector, Invader, Dead, Alive

But there was one time when we were not

When he cradled me in his arms, trying to mend my unrepairable heart, and those tears streaking down his jade colored face

We were together in our stupidity

We were one in our regret

We...

A light shines before me

"Do you wish to be together with him once more?"

"Yes!"

We will meet again Zim

I step into the light

We will be together again soon Zim

We...


	3. Moth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A new smeet is hatched, the one and only of it's kind to ever be recorded. What shall this smeet become I wonder? Will he become what his past life vowed to destroy? Or will he become the enemy to that which he swore to be with upon his return? I hope you're intrigued because I'm gonna leave you with this bone to chew on. Hope you enjoy the pain I suffered. This shouldn't even exist. Thank you all for making me think about this. Feel the guilt. FEEL IT!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Screw it. YOU GUYS MADE ME THINK OF DIB'S REINCARNATION DAMN YOU! this is officially going to be a story. Damn it. Damn it. DAMN IT! I DON'T HAVE TIME TO BE WRITING THIS! I NEED TO BE UPDATING MY OTHER STORIES INSTEAD OF ADDING TO THIS! IT WAS COMPLETE CAMERON!!! WHY'D YOU HAVE TO GO AND THINK ABOUT DIB'S PROMISE!? YYYYYY UUUU DOOOOO DIIIIIIS!?!?

The Irken smeet was released out of the incubation capsule, large head landing on the floor with a sickening splat.

"Oooow." The smeet's gazed upon the Irken smeetery, golden optics analyzing it's surroundings.

A metal limb zoomed forward, a P.A.K. in one arm and another leaking electricity like a high powered tazer.

The smeet's eyes widened in fear, "NO! STAY AWAY FROM ME! I DON'T NEED THAT DAMN THING! I'M NOT A MACHINE!"

The limb paused, x-raying the smeet to identify why it's behavior is so abnormal.

All is clear when it sees it's head. It's brain is developed like a full grown Tallest would be, and instead of two sleek black antenna there are three. The one in the middle is large, zig-zagged, and comprised of excess protein strands. It's optics resemble pools of mixed amber and gold, a color never before recorded in any Irken. And it's brain is more developed than an Irken pilot. This smeet could take the Invader test and pass with flying colors in the cognotive portion.

"Smeet registers as semi-genius, mutant anomaly. Searching through database for Protocol." 

The smeet's golden gaze squinted in concentration, _Gotta find a way outta here._

It's eyes glow when they alight on a tube that reads 'Exit Only' in bold ... Irken letters.

"Why do I recognize them as 'Irken' letters? Why don't I recognize them as 'Krin' the actually languages name rather than my race's language?" The small big-headed Smeet asks allowed, "Why am I talking to myself?"

The arm beeps, "Protocol could not be found. Contacting Tallest and Control brains for Instructions."

The smeet starts to panic for no logical reason, "air, need air...needairneedairneedair!" He starts to hyperventilate.

The Arm analyzes the unusual smeet and makes soothing beeps, registering the racing squiddlispooch.

It relaxes slightly, "umm... while you're contacting the Tallest... can I see that P.A.K.? I won't tamper with it or anything. It just seems like they will be extremely busy snacking as always-" the smeet thinks in further confusion. _How do I know who the Tallest are? I was taken out not five minutes ago. I'm FUNCTIONING without a P.A.K. for bigfoots sake! WHY DO I KNOW WHAT A BIGFOOT IS? WHAT IS GOING ON?_

The robot arm stops for a moment, then reluctantly hands the P.A.K. over to the pale peridot smeet, "Do not tamper with it."

The smeet grins excitedly, opening it up and does exactly what the robot arm told him not to do. _A personality chip? No thank you, already have one I don't need another, an emotional dampener? Seriously? Again no thank you~ okay a loyalty circuit I kind of get but still that's a no…A control chip directly connected to the control brains incase of immediate disposal._ The smeet has a miniature war going on inside his head.

 _I don't want to be controlled by the control brains, I don't want another personality, and I don't want to become an emotionless zombie soldier doing things I don't want to do. But I'm an Irken, I'm supposed to be a controlled soldier, I'm supposed to be emotionless, and I'm supposed to be loyal to the Tallest and the Control brains. Why am I different then?_ The smeet makes a decision. _I'm not gonna be controlled. I was born with self awareness, and normal smeets aren't, which is apparent by the Metal arm mother's search for non-existing Protocol. I therefore will probably be deemed as defective and terminated immediately._

The smeet quickly and silently destroys the four items he deems threatening and closes the P.A.K. his face is reflected on the metallic surface, "my appearance speaks for itself."

_I have three antenna-okay the middle thing isn't an antenna that's hair which Irken's definitely don't have and I still have weird knowledge that no new-hatched smeet should have either. My optics are an unusual non-native color, and my head is... no I refuse to call it that. There could be plenty of Irkens I've never seen with heads this size-How do I even know what another Irken looks like?_

The smeet looks up at the robotic arm, "hey I have a quick question. Can I put this on?"

The robotic mother-arm stops it's call once more, looking at the weird little smeet, "I suppose, just-just remain where you are and don't do anything stupid."

The robot arm continues beeping and waiting for an answer with the busy leaders of Irk.

The smeet hides a smirk, it opens the P.A.K. back up and continues tampering with the tools inside. _ooooh~ I didn't know there was a wings option and a color chooser... hmm black and blue are way better than fairy forbid pink and silver._

He quickly closes the P.A.K. once more, puts it on his back and presses the activation button. The silver of the P.A.K. turns a sleek black and the pink openings turn a deep blue color, similar colored P.A.K. limbs shoot out and are wobbly. He looks at the unattentive metal-arm mother and continues experimenting, quickly gaining control of the limbs with precision. However, the P.A.K. limbs create a pair of wings, blue white electricity pruning between the metal like a bug sapper. _this could be interesting._ He quickly deactivates the wings.

Making a split second decision he's up the tube and in a different room filled with Irken uniforms, miles upon miles of cloths that are being made in an assembly line of robotics arms. The smeet quickly snags a long _ugg pink_ tunic, some black pants, and a pair of black gloves and boots. The smeet searches for anything to cover his head and P.A.K. coming up with a long black robe with a hood.

"perfect."

The smeet hastily put it on. A door opened and there were several unclothed smeet that entered, followed by an adult Irken fully clothed and boasting the title of head smeet Analyzer. The clothed smeet ducks under the aisle of cloths, and attempted to calm his breathing.

"Now choose 1 item of clothing each. As well as a pair of gloves and boots. Oh, and a robe." The Irken commands in a bored sneering fashion.

The smeets quickly do as they are told, _Now's my chance!_ the hidden smeet comes out of hiding and gets to the end of the line, already clothed and standing tall.

The other smeets are too nervous to notice the newest addition to their Hatch, the full grown Irken doesn't notice either though. Soon they are led to a gathering area and a lasered edged robotic arm is etching letters into an Irken's P.A.K.

"This is the namer. It will encrypted your preferred name onto your P.A.K.'s. Now get in line." The smeets immediately get into a haphazard line leading to the namer. And then the robes were ordered off.

The unusual smeet panics just a bit.

"You must remove your robe, it is in the way." The laser arm deamnds.

The smeet shakily sighs but complies, flipping the hood and getting it over with.

"I-I am an authorized anomaly. Otherwise I would have been terminated upon hatching. I wish you all to treat me as any other Irken smeet." The weird smeet comes up with.

"What name do you request?" The laser arm-thing asks in a mechanically curious manner. _what_ is _my name?_.

The smeet turns determinedly towards the laser arm, "I-I would like to go by M-Moth..."

The Laser goes off, quickly and effectively etching the four letter words into the black and blue P.A.K.

"Okay smeet _Moth_ … it's time to assign you to classes. Follow me." The adult Irken sneers.

The smeets quickly look away and face forward, Moth follows.

***

"This is the first test. You must complete this obstacle course before the timer, " the instructor points at the floating timer, "runs out. Now I don't want any whiners, whoever gets through it first will get to take the next test with an advanced group. Ok begi- what the flark are you?"

A small smeet by the name of Khan "k-an" stepped forward, "Moth is an authorized anomaly and is to be treated like any other smeet here."

Moth grins shyly at Khan, Khan smiles back warmly, the Instructor continues glaring at the two smeets, "Whatever, I am Instructor Blarg. Now as I was saying begin!"

Moth was the first to react, using his P.A.K. legs, slicing through projectiles and parkouring up the wall without using the rope provided.

However, instead of passing the finish line, Moth sits in front of it and waits. The smeets that pass him almost trip in astonishment. Khan is the second to last smeet to cross the finish line. Moth is the one in absolute last place.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU CROSS THE LINE!? YOU WERE THE FIRST ONE THERE!" Instructor Blarg demands, an interesting blue shade coloring his face, Moth can see the digital plates in the furious Irken's optics from the mere centimeters he is from his face.

Moth doesn't give an inch, _I've faced scarier-When did I-never mind that's not important._ , "I'm not gonna leave a fellow Irken behind."

The Instructor blinks owlishly, "Wh-that wasn't the objective of this test. This test was about who was the physical best, this test had nothing to do with leadership Smeet Moth."

Moth doesn't give an inch, "That shouldn't matter. If I couldn't even trust a fellow Irken in the field to have my back then how could I even operate in the field to my fullest capability?"

"That's a great question Smeet Moth." A voice intercoms. Moth jumps, the voice sounds vaguely masculine.

"We'll have to discuss it later when we're face to face. Instructor Blarg, this smeet is being reassigned to S9091."

Instructor Blarg's mouth resembles a fish, "But General Raol! HE'S A-A NEWLY HATCHED **SMEET**! THAT CLASS WILL BE GRADUATING WITHIN 3 ROTATIONS! THE SHORTEST SMEETING PERIOD WOULD HAVE TO BE 10 ROTATIONS! AND THAT WAS THE GREAT TALLEST FRIF!"

The smeets eyes are all wide and staring awed at Moth.

"Exactly. Did you know that Smeet Moth could read Krin upon hatching? That he could get up and walk around without having to receive the zap of life _or_ his P.A.K.? He even succeeded in escaping his metal arm-mother and infiltrating a class. He manipulated everyone he came across. Even with the disadvantage of his appearance being an anomaly. That is the level of genius he has shown. The Control Brains commanded I check on this situation. I was to judge whether he would be declared a defective or not. And I almost did, I was a flarks-breadth away from pushing the button of his demise when I saw him waiting by that finish line, disobeying direct orders. But then I heard his refreshing and loyal answer. Now _THAT_ is an Irken soldier I'd want to go into battle with. His brain is more developed than an Irken Pilot. He could possibly take an Invader test and pass with new highest records. And that is only what the arm-mother reported on a brief and limited analysis. Send him and the smeet Khan to my private office immediately."

Instructor Blarg closes his mouth with an audible click, his eyes resting on the creature in front of him. He lowers his head and points to the door, "go out that door and turn left, don't turn. Just keep going straight until you make it to the end. It'll be a large flashy door, you can't miss it."

Khan is startled at his name being spoken as well but soon a grin spreads across his dark emerald face, purple optics glistening. Moth grins and salutes the smeets in the room. Several puff out their chests and salute back. Others lower their heads and quiver their antenna.

Moth and Khan march out of the door. Both a little happy inside, both a little scared, and both a little worried about their futures.

***

"Welcome. Please have a seat." They both take a seat on the plushy squishy velvet chairs. An average full grown Irken clad in Magenta and has an Elite tattooed gilph on his forehead is lounging in his likewise comfortable looking chair. His Magenta eyes linger on Moth, Moth feels slightly nostalgic. _His eyes... I've seen that color somewhere... but where?_

"My name is General Raol , as you both heard on the intercom. Now Smeet Moth, you will be assigned to S9091 as I also stated on the intercom. Khan, I am going to give you a choice, you can return to your class and continue on. Or you can join Moth as a personal drone/subordinate and graduate with him."

Khan's purple eyes widen, to be a drone is to be the lowest of the low. Then again, to be a declared subordinate is a great honor. Moth doesn't know which it leans more towards but the higher the Irken master is, the higher the subordinate becomes in Irken society. They both know that a number of unknown variables could make Khan's life become a living hell. If Moth were to never become an Invader, much less an Elite, then Khan would be sleeping on the hard ground and have nothing but nutrient pills, low quality sugar capsules, and liquid mercury to get by. And if Moth died Khan would be disgraced and his statis would be lowered to slave at best and planetary cannon sweep fodder at worst. 

Khan takes a shakey breath. But the perks were boundless. If Moth's ambitions rose to the height of Tallest then Khan would be one of the highest ranking Irkens in existence. _This is the mother of all gambles._

"Remember Khan, this is a choice. You can always choose the other option. You surpassing me is as likely as anything." Moth states, melted gold meeting amethyst.

Khan's eyes almost seem to sparkle, "I accept. Mainly because I feel like I could trust you with my life. The other reason? I like you. You ooze leadership like a glrk-slug leaks mucus."

Moth snickers, General Raol snorts before coughing in attempting to cover it up.

Khan submissively intwines an antenna with Moth, "Just don't screw up or we'll both be hurting Kay?"

Moth smiles. _I have a friend, for the first time in my life- my life has just begun... shut-up inner dialogue._

***

Moth slept in an assigned cot and dreamed. 

_The battle cry of an Irken._

_The slash of P.A.K. legs in flesh._

_A searing pain in the left side of his chest._

_A battle of life and death._

_Cackling, blood, pain..._

_"We..."_

_Tears-_

Moth jerks up in his cot, awake, alarmed, shaking, and breathing hard. He feels wettness on his face.

Moth takes a gloved hand, wipes at the liquid and analyzes it. It's- **H2O**. _This is called crying... Irkens_ NEVER _cry… so why was he? Who_ IS _he!?_ He quickly wipes away the liquid and returns to laying down. _If Irkens don't cry... then what_ AM _I!?_

**Author's Note:**

> Seriously sad right now, *tears up* just my take on what I think would happen if Zim eventually killed Dib.


End file.
